Is it a problem with choice or Pull of our senses ?

The old books, cloths, shoes, jackets which we were receiving from people coming in to give were across our table. We were doing our fist preloved sale aka 2nd hand products which we had received from our previous collection drive. 

Needless to say my eyes were lit when I saw a Murakami book “First Person Singular” (one of my favourite author), a book on climbing the Annapurna peak (I had just come back from ‘Har Ki Dun Trek’ and my mind was filled with mountains, The inside story of GUT(my last 1 years work on changing my food habits to get the gut going), How do you live ? By Genzaburo Yoshino (A book written in in 1937 and was translated in Japanese in 2021 and inspired Hayao Miyazaki of Ghibli Studio to make his last film - The Boy and the Heron, Now Ghibli is and Miyazaki are my gold standard in animation) and lastly, Sum - A book on after life (maybe the B/W picture on the cover - otherwise no RATIONAL reason). 

I picked all of them and kept them aside.

Now I am a person who is very very diligent of what book I read or movies I see - there has to be a strong reason. Why ? because I am investing my 1 hr every working day and few hrs in the non working days to read - experience - feel them. Which otherwise I could have done so many other things. And I don’t mind investing any amount in a book if I want to read it. 

But here I was with an array of books which I could read and give back and it will be sold in the next PRELOVED SALE. This was my rationalization. Everything you see above in (is the rationale).

But as I drove back home, the other side of the brain kicked in::

But these were meant for needy people 

Which needy person (read maids / security guards who bought) reads Murakami. Blah

But if the rich person bought these books then money would have gone to trust.

Hardly any fiction / non fiction book were bought, only children books were sold. Anyway there will many more sales opportunities after this. People can buy them.

I tie myself in these ideological ruminations. Sometimes (like today) I ask myself - do we really need to get into these mental debates ? Will it make me a better person? Am I judging myself hard or trying to be perfect ? What is perfect anyway ?

But when the questions come - It pours.
For once I thought I will pour it out on paper blog 🙂

& Not look for an answer.

Self Quote “Most questions about life do not have multiple choice answers.”